“What’s your opinion?” That may be one of the most exciting questions you’ll hear. It’s exciting because someone wants and values your opinion. But, should we always give our opinion? Should we even have an opinion?

Everyone seems to have a view on everything, and we love having our thoughts heard everywhere. That’s why, in some situations, I’ve learned that, it’s sometimes better to keep quiet than to say something. Proverbs says that staying quiet in certain situations makes a fool even seem wise (17:27-28). I was actually reminded of this very recently in a group discussion I was having: sometimes it’s better to just listen, otherwise you may look like a fool.

Sometimes the forum that discussions are in aren’t very conducive to new ideas. Occasionally, they can actually be opposed to new thoughts. Bringing something new to the table, especially when not having mutual respect across the table, can sometimes make you seem ignorant to those at the table (in this instance, there’s possibly a problem in the group dynamic, as well).

I also remember a time years ago, where my team at the time was at dinner and we had a round table discussion where the leader of the team wanted everyone to voice their opinions on a topic. We went around the table for about an hour and a half. It was a great discussion, and I really enjoyed it. However, once the discussion was wrapped up and the leader spoke, he stated that we’d be going with their original plan on the topic, which was then laid out to everyone. It felt as if none of our ideas were heard.

I left that meeting actually feeling manipulated. My opinion didn’t seem valued or considered. Nothing ever came about that discussion, long term. The only thing the meeting was meant to do was explain what was happening next – not hear our ideas and implement those new ideas into the plan. I learned some valuable lessons from that day.

Here are some ways I try to help foster ideas and opinions of others:

  • Humility. Never start with a prove-me-wrong attitude. It doesn’t foster dissenting views, unless you have people who are more dominant – and even then, they’ll dominate the non-dominating leaders.
  • Time. Not everyone is quick on their toes. Some of your best ideas will come from those who can simmer on it. Often times they’ll come back to an individual (not the group), so always have an open door.
  • Simplicity. Don’t ignore simple ideas. Sometimes the easiest and most simplistic ideas may be what you need.
  • Listening. Listen especially to majority themes. If the majority is toying with an idea, but you don’t think it’d work, challenge them to test it out. Not trying something because you don’t think it’d work doesn’t help you or them grow. Even if it doesn’t work – failure is one of the best ways to help someone grow.
  • Prepare. Come with several ideas. And, have at least one idea you don’t want to do or don’t think will work. You don’t want your team to be robots, merely repeating what you ask.
  • Keep it small. Don’t ask everyone for feedback. Sometimes the worst places for opinions are places where there’s several domineering people, along with others who are more thoughtful. If that happens, try breaking that group down more. Also, generally, the more people you have in a meeting, the less will get accomplished. Unless the meeting is primarily for disseminating information, try to keep the group to under ten people.

Don’t mistake this to say opinions are bad, or even wrong. I don’t mean that at all. Opinions should be full of humility. Your opinion doesn’t define you or me. If you never put yourself out there and risk failing, you may never fail. But, you’ll also never succeed – which is worse than failing, in the end.


What is the heart behind what you do? Said another way: Are the things I’m doing and talking about only said or shown because I am wanting to bring attention to people I’m with and the things I get to do?

I can tell you, every week, I fail in this area in some way. Maybe it’s a certain picture I want to post so others can see a popular person I get to be around. Maybe it’s sharing about something awesome I got to do or be a part of. I’m not saying we all stop sharing pictures and sharing things we get to do, that’s the purpose behind social media: to share any part of our lives that we want to share with people who follow us. But, what’s the reason behind what we’re sharing? Are we generally excited and happy about what transpired, with the intention to encourage or uplift others? Or, is it for more likes, more popularity, more clicks, more “look who I get to be with, and who you don’t get to be with”, or more attention on ourselves?

I want the why to be the lense I use when looking at what I am doing, or sharing, or posting, or talking about.

When disciples were asking Jesus who the greatest in the Kingdom was, and Jesus called a child to him and said something entirely different than what any of them were expecting: “anyone who becomes as humble as this little child is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven.” (Matt 18:4 NLT)

It’s so easy to share things for the wrong motives; and, if I’m honest, when I do it, it’s really just my own pride. It’s part of the reason why I don’t think badges or titles should matter, unless they’re strictly used to bring honor to someone – like people on an executive team. Otherwise, who are we really building up? Probably just ourselves.

My goal, and I believe our goal as Christians, should be to be more like children: Loving people with a naivety of title, position, and rank.


I come from an Air Force family. My dad served for 20 years, so I got to experience a lot of different cultures and parts of the world. That also meant changing schools and getting a different set of friends every couple of years.

One of my dad’s assignments was in a little town of a few hundred people in Alaska. There, I got my first real glimpse of technology. The library was open every Wednesday afternoon during the summer, and I’d want to go and use their computers and play games. But, even more so, I wanted to learn how the computers worked and that’s what I’d do every week.

During the late 90s, while in middle school, I gave my life to Christ, and started really seeking Him. I wanted to do something to make a difference. During that time, I played some online games and was involved in a Christian gaming group (clan), where I’d eventually be placed into leadership and worked on managing the discussion forums. Honestly, I had no idea what “leading” even meant at the time – I was just enjoying what I was doing.

Around the same time, I became interested in programming and I started working on modifying the discussion forum system that we were using for the clan. Several of the changes and additions actually were related to the graphics systems, and many of the changes I made were put into the release of the system.

Soon after, I wanted to build my own discussion system from scratch, which I called E-Blah. I worked on E-Blah while I was in highschool and much of my college years. I learned a lot about leadership, systems, and managing software releases and documentation. At its peak, E-Blah had thousands of users from all over the world and helped me pay my way through college.

While in college, I got involved with a Christian Music Forum, which was rising in popularity, and I also got involved in the moderation team there. I learned a lot about how to understand and work with difficult people doing that forums moderation work.

In my last year of college, I started working at a small company of around 20 people that did e-commerce. That work experience was probably one of the most fun, challenging, and interesting places I’ve worked. I learned how to be a better leader, how culture can either nourish or kill a company, how to plan and implement systems, and how to organize and lead a small team. I was given more favor there than I honestly deserved.

While working there, I was asked to be part of a board of a small local church. While there, I learned, among other things, about leadership and why systems, and following the systems, are important. I was with that church until 2010 when I felt called to join the church I serve today.

While many of the opportunities I’ve had has taught me a lot about the business, practical, or system side of things, where I work and serve now really has taught me how to care for the people that I lead and influence. How I wish I could go back to that e-commerce job with the things I know now! Much of what I did there was without grace, I wanted things to get better, but I couldn’t get that vision to the people. I always had the blessing and approvement of the management who was over me, but I did not always have that from the people I was leading or trying to influence.

This is brief overview of my history and how I got to where I am now. It’s obviously missing a lot of the in between details. That said, various things I may reference later on will tie back into this introduction. I’ve never written out my history like this – I can count on one hand the people that know all of this. I’ve been reluctant to share my story for many reasons, but, I’m slowly understanding that God has put me in each of these situations, positions, and areas for a reason. I’m still growing and learning a lot, and I can’t wait to see what’s next.

The Beginning

Several years ago, I kept a blog up and wrote a lot of different things in it. Within the past few weeks, I’ve thought about bringing it back, but in looking at it all, so much has changed. I felt a fresh fresh start would be better.

So, I’m refocusing things and bringing back this site. I intend, this time, to make this a little more focused on a few things, instead of a lot. This will be my thoughts, with my primary focus being on the way I see leadership, things I’m working through, and spiritual/Christian topics.

In thinking about an audience, I’ve thought about a lot, too. This is first and foremost for me to put my thoughts out. I’m a thinker, and I think a lot of times I don’t spend enough time just writing out my thoughts. So, is the audience me? I don’t know. I do think others might find some topics interesting, but if I would say anything I’m going to focus on it being more for me.

There’s already a few topics I have planned that have been in my head, so they’ll be coming up soon. Thanks for reading!